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Remaining respectful in divorce is often a choice

Divorce is always difficult on some level, even when all parties involved want the divorce and believe it's a good thing. Unfortunately, divorce deals with many of the issues that most people find very difficult to discuss fairly and calmly. If you and your spouse face a divorce, no matter what the grounds, it is wise to prioritize keeping the matter as civil as possible, to ensure that both spouses can make it through the entire process fairly, keeping each party's rights protected.

Keeping things civil in a divorce does not happen naturally. Few processes hold the ability to stir up contentious human responses like divorce, necessitating careful planning if you hope to keep the matter respectful.

If you do hope for amicable divorce, make sure that your spouse understands this and makes it a priority. It may mean sacrificing some assets or privileges, which is normal. In the heat of the moment, most spouses either dig in their heels and fight for every square inch they can or throw their hands up and refuse to participate meaningfully in the process because they are already emotionally done. Neither of these responses are wise.

Wisdom suggests that your divorce can be as calm and respectful as you and your spouse allow it to be. Many spouses get about a year or so past their divorce and realize that they could have saved themselves months of heartache by simply allowing themselves to think about these conflicts differently.

It is also wise to enlist the help of an experienced attorney who can walk you through each step of the divorce process and keep your goals and actions aligned. If you truly want a respectful divorce, the methods and experience of the attorney you choose are very important to consider. With professional guidance from an attorney who aligns with your priorities, you can ensure that your rights remain protected as you work towards a fair, respectful divorce.

Source: Findlaw, "Divorce: Easing the Strain on Children," accessed Dec. 08, 2017

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