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How to divorce proof your holidays

When you stood in a Kentucky courtroom and listened to a judge pronounce the terms of your divorce, you may have experienced mixed emotions. On one hand, you may have felt relief that your martial problems were finally coming to an end and you were free to set your sights on a new, successful future. Then again, you were saying goodbye to a way of life you had known for years, perhaps decades, and such farewells are seldom without sorrow.

In the days and weeks that followed your divorce settlement day, you and your children may have spent time making plans for your future. Perhaps you took a little vacation together or created bucket lists where each of you added your own goals. Overall, you might have faced several challenges along the way, but generally felt like everything was going to be okay, that is, until you starting preparing for Thanksgiving.

Can holiday stress be avoided?

Right off the bat, you and your former spouse began arguing about where your kids would spend Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year. While most holidays involve some sort of stress, the following ideas may help you keep problems related to your divorce at bay:

  • If you didn't lay the groundwork for your holiday parenting plan by putting it all in writing before you finalized your divorce, you may want to consider seeking modification of your court order. When you can look at a court document to resolve disputed custody or visitation arrangements, it can alleviate a lot of stress.
  • Better yet, by thinking and planning ahead, you may not run into such problems at all. You can schedule up to a year (or more) in advance. Create a list for each parent to fill in which holidays and special events he or she wishes to share with your children, and then negotiate where necessary.
  • If you're on friendly terms with your former spouse, you may want to spend holidays together so your children experience the presence of both parents.
  • Family time is especially important for children adapting to lifestyles after divorce. If you and your kids create new traditions together, you can build lasting memories and encourage festive celebrations, rather than dwelling on the fact that you are no longer all under one roof.

Maintaining a positive attitude for the sakes of your children does not mean you have to sit back and let someone walk all over you by impeding your ability to carry out your parenting plan or celebrate holidays to your own liking.

Help is available

Even a small post-divorce legal issue can snowball into a major holiday disaster if you're not careful. It's typically best to address problems head on, but it may be difficult to do so if the other party involved refuses to cooperate. By accessing available support resources, you can get things back on track and ring in a happy holiday season.

Many Kentucky parents in similar situations nip post-divorce holiday troubles in the bud by relying on aggressive family law representation in court.

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